Monthly Archives: May 2014

How to Eat a Cupcake Like a Gentleman

(Via YouTube.)

Should you find yourself eating a cupcake while in the presence of 1) royalty, 2) the Pope, or 3) Sheldon Cooper, here’s a refresher on the do’s and don’ts of cupcake eating.

(Also acceptable: using a knife and fork to slice the cupcake into ever-so-delicate pieces to be subtly placed inside one’s mouth during casual conversation; flagging down a waiter and asking that the cupcake be juiced first; politely declining the offer of cupcakes altogether on the basis of violent diarrhea.)

Go Do Something

You don't have to go fast, you just have to go.

(Via The Body Department.)

Do something you’ve been putting off, whether it’s jogging around the block, doing a few sets with those nearly-forgotten weights under your bed, dancing in the rain, singing in the shower, acting in a play, or producing your own puppet show. Paint a portrait, travel to a foreign land—or merely down the street to the local park. Learn to play the banjo. Invent a new sandwich called the “Jesse Eisenburger.” Write a story, a novel, a letter to your mom. Take up Yoga. Push the living room furniture aside and build a miniature metropolis out of Legos and Lincoln Logs. Invent a new board game with your kids. Host your very own Catch Phrase Championships with friends. Live, love—

go.

Happy Towel Day

Don't panic and carry a towel

May 25th, besides being May 25th, is also Towel Day. It’s also the day I posted this link to six life lessons as gleaned from the various utterings of Marvin, the proto-emo robot dude from Douglas Adams’ The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy series.

Happy Towel Day—to which Marvin would no doubt respond, “Oh, not another one.”

Grasshopper and Grandmaster

Master: Sit.

Grasshopper: Where?

Master: There.

Grasshopper: I don’t see a chair.

Master: Chair is there if you believe it is there.

Grasshopper sits, falls through thin air.

Master (chuckling): You did not believe chair was there.

Post-gogo

The Oatmeal Man

With just two days until the finish line, it looks like The Oatmeal Man Indiegogo campaign won’t quite reach its original goal of $10,500. The good news is, it has hit its DVD milestone, which means that while we haven’t raised enough funds to get the film onto Netflix, iTunes, Redbox, etc. just yet, our contributors will be getting their shiny, limited edition, two-disc DVD sets come July. A humongous thank-you to each and every one of our honorary Oates who joined the campaign, rallied our high-fiber cause, or otherwise supported this silly little tale about a humble cereal killer and his unsuspecting victims. You rawk.

The movie’s a hard sell; we knew that going in. Manclam, at least, has scientific value. But an oatmeal man? Come on. No one likes oatmeal. To be honest, I didn’t think we’d even get $100—so, it’s a pleasant surprise that we’ve made it this far. Again, props to our backers. And for those who aren’t able to contribute this time around, hang tight: we’re still working on finding a distributor for a wider DVD release in the not-too-distant future.

As there is still a little sand left in the hourglass (two days, as of this writing), here are some links for any last-minute contributors:

Lastly, don’t forget to eat your oatmeal. ;)